Most kids, at one time or another, try to fake a note from their parents. It might be because they want to skip school for the day, it might be because they’ve hidden a bad report card from their mom and dad, or it might be because their parents won’t let them go on that awesome overnight trip.

Unfortunately, that’s the only experience most adults have with faking a note. So if the time ever comes when they desperately need to create a fake doctor’s note, they’re working from a very poor experiential background – they’re relying on what they learned as kids, and their excuse letters usually show it.

If you find yourself in the situation where you need to create, or download, a fake doctor’s note, here are some important pointers about what it should contain.

• The note should be printed on good quality paper, not the cheap stuff you might buy in a 1000-sheet package at Office Depot. Have you ever seen a real doctor’s letter on that flimsy white stuff? Probably not.
• The note should have authentic names and addresses, logos, graphics and even watermarks, so that it carries the full weight of a real letter written by a real doctor or hospital. Making it look like “the real thing” is often the key to whether it’s accepted without a challenge.
• The medical language and grammar should be correct and appropriate. The grammar part is obvious, but doctors don’t write like patients; for example, they wouldn’t write “heart attack,” they’d write “myocardial infarction” or “MI” instead. A little bit of online research will give you the right words to use.
• There’s no need to “overwrite” the note unless it’s being used to cover a long absence. Plenty of detail is appropriate for a fake hospital discharge report, but not for a clinic note written by an overworked staffer, who is simply explaining the case of strep throat which forced you to miss a day of work.
• The fake doctors note should be believable. It’s unlikely that a 65-year old gets a torn ACL (which is usually suffered by athletes), but it’s easy to believe that she fell down her front steps and broke her foot. Conversely, a 22-year old probably isn’t going to be believed if he presents a fake doctors excuse from a cancer doctor, while it would seem plausible if a 52-year old turned in that same excuse letter. (He’d probably get extra-special sympathy and treatment at work, too.)

Fake doctors’ notes can be a lifesaver when you have to explain an absence from work or school, but if they’re prepared carelessly they can cause you more serious problems than an just an unpaid day, a reprimand or detention. Be careful and pay attention to detail, and you should skate without a hitch.

Lots of people can talk their way out of just about anything. We all know those people; they’re glib, they’re charming, and if they miss a day’s work they can probably find a way to escape not only without a warning, but with their boss thanking them for all of their good work over the year.

Most of us aren’t like that. When confronted with a problem like a boss demanding to know why we weren’t at the office yesterday, we sweat, stammer and pray a lot before swallowing hard and taking our medicine.

Fake doctor notes were created just for people like us. We have almost no chance of slipping and sliding our way through life – we need help. The kind of help that’s easily obtainable by simply getting a reasonable excuse letter.

What kinds of jams can fake doctors excuses get you out of? The list is almost endless; here are just some of the possibilities:

When you’ve really been sick: Many times you wake up and just don’t feel good. You’re not sick enough to go to the doctor, you’re just sick enough to stumble to the kitchen, drink some orange juice or tea, take some aspirin, and crawl back into bed. On days like that, you’re not going to be getting a doctor’s note to give to the boss, even if you really felt awful, and even if you’re required to show one in order to be paid for a sick day. A good fake note can solve that issue quickly and easily.

When you’ve had to “sleep it off”: Let’s face it, it happens. You’re out having a good time – in fact, too good a time. You wake up with a splitting headache and there’s no way you can deal with work. No doctor is going to give you an excuse for that (unless you were partying with them the night before). Answer? A fake physician’s note.

When you have a household or family appointment or emergency: Everyone wants to be a good parent and spouse, and that means you may be faced with a mid-day teacher’s conference, an ill wife or husband, a broken water heater that’s flooding your basement, or an unexpected run to the emergency room. Some companies are very understanding in situations like this. Many are not. There’s no reason you should be punished for attending to important personal situations, and a fake doctor letter can let you do what you need to do while avoiding docked pay, notes in your personnel file, or worse.

When you just need time off: It’s nice when an employer allows you a certain number of personal days each year. Unfortunately, most still don’t, even though we’ve all had those days when we just need to recharge our batteries. Whether it’s a day at the beach, extra time in bed, an outing to the casino or a day with the family, we all need that break every once in a while. When your bosses can’t (or won’t) understand that, a fake doctor’s note can get you that “mental health day” everyone just has to take every so often.

It’s too bad that common sense illnesses, problems or emergencies sometimes require a little creative thinking in order to get off without a slap on the wrist or a whack to the wallet. But it happens, and that’s when fake doctor’s excuses are a terrific fallback to have.